Ugly lady boards touring train, carrying an ugly child. Along the route, a rude fellow observes for a while and says, "man, your baby is ugly !"
Woman gets all riled up, starts shouting and screaming at the rude man. Conductor hears the ruckus..tries to quiet the commotion and says;
"sorry you're upset lady, but I hope you will feel better, because I am writing up a slip you to have free meal back in our dining car !"
Woman seems placated and quiets down, when the conductor adds as an after thought, ..."and maybe the chef will give you a bag of peanuts for your monkey !"